Hi, friends. Welcome to the Life with Loverly podcast. I’m Brittany, a wife, mom, and lifestyle entrepreneur here to help you discover your best daily style and encourage you to try new things when getting dressed each day. I took a tiny following on social media and turned it into a community of over one million amazing women, and I am so glad you’re here. I’ll be sharing my heart with you beyond the 15 seconds on Instagram, so we’ll be diving into things like personal growth, friendships, motherhood, marriage, and of course, the business of blogging. Really, this space is here to serve as your go-to resource to building a life you adore while sprinkling some kindness to others along the way. Grab an iced coffee and let’s do life together. I’m Brittany, and this is the Life With Loverly podcast. Hi friends. Welcome back to the Life With Loverly Podcast. Today’s episode is so special. I’m sitting down with the incredible Liliana Vasquez, TV host, style expert, storyteller, and Total Powerhouse. From growing up in Fort Worth as a first-generation Latina to walking away from a six-figure job to chase a fashion dream in New York, Liliana’s story is all about grit, vision, and learning how to own your voice and your worth. We talk about how she shifted from the Today Show to eNews, the moment she knew it was time to pivot out of television, and what building a brand looks like to her now. It’s honest, bold, and full of heart, and I cannot wait for you to hear it. Here’s my conversation with Liliana Vasquez. Okay. Hi, friends. Welcome back to the Life with Loverly podcast. I am so excited today. I am interviewing Liliana Vasquez, and I am just really excited for our conversation that we’re about to have. I’ve been following you on Instagram for a while and love just the styling videos that you do. And I’m just excited to hear a little bit more about your backstory. And I think our listeners are going to absolutely love our conversation, so welcome to the show.

Thank you for having me. I have to say, I’m also such a fan of yours. I’m a little bit late to the influencer lifestyle, and you were one of those immediate follows. And I was like, “This is somebody that really understands how to build a community and how to really share authentically.” So thank you so much for having me. I’m honored to be here.

Well, thank you. Okay, so you grew up in Fort Worth and English was your second language. Yes. What were those early years like for you?

Oh my gosh, they were so hard. I think for me, I always felt, and even to this day, I still think it’s one of the topics I have a lot of discussions with my therapist about. I always felt like an outsider. And I think for anybody that’s first generation or isn’t born here and they kind of step into whatever foreign environment that is, you always have a little bit of this kind of, we call it imposter syndrome now. I don’t think back then my mom or my dad had the words to really share that with me, but now we do have that language. And so it was really hard. My family was different. We listened to different music. We ate different food. We spoke a different language at home. And I was growing up in Fort Worth, Texas, right smack in the middle of Texas. It’s a pretty conservative state. And while there was a huge Latino community, I wasn’t necessarily part of that community because for me, I went to a private school in Fort Worth. And the reason I went to that school is because my mom immediately knew that for her, something she wished she had had more opportunity with was education. And so she just immediately off the bat, the second she had me, always says, “I knew that regardless of what I did, I would make sure that you had the best education. It didn’t matter what I had to do, I knew that I was going to give that to you.” So I was a little bit of a fish out of water entering a really kind of high-end private school where the kids wore uniforms and everyone’s parents drove Benzes and BMWs, and here we were in our Subaru. But I think it really toughened me up in a way that I’m really grateful for now as an adult.

Yeah. Well, your mom sounds incredible that she had this desire and dream for you. What did she teach you about education and what did she sacrifice to help you kind of dream bigger?

Oh my gosh, everything. I mean, obviously so much of my success today is really deeply rooted, not just in her, but I think in also my grandmother who’s sadly no longer here. But I come from a long line of really hardworking, tenacious women at a time when women weren’t really valued for that quality. That was a time where that was maybe looked down upon or looked at as a challenge. And I think about my grandmother, she was this tiny person. She was like four foot 11 and she had nine kids and moved to the United States from Mexico. And my grandfather ultimately decided that the US wasn’t the place for him. He moved back. And she said, “I’m not going back because this is where I want my family to have their future.” And so I think a lot of that learning passed on to my mom, and she thought the same thing. The world that she had was amazing and special, but she dreamed bigger for herself and she dreamed bigger for me. And she always felt like the one thing that is the ultimate equalizer is education. If you can access education, it unlocks incredible opportunities for anybody. And that’s what she really wanted to give me. And so I remember she says she had this pivotal moment where she didn’t even know what to do. Public school was the only thing she had ever heard of. It was the only thing she had ever done. And so somebody had mentioned to her private schools. And she though, “Private? Well, what’s that?” And my mom wasn’t even born in the States. My mom moved to this country from just 12 years old. And so this was very foreign to her. And she had me at a really young age. She was 20 years old when she had me. She says she opened the phone books. For anyone listening, we used to have phone books.

Yes. So true.

Sometimes I say words and I’m like, wait a second, I am dating myself and nobody knows what that means. So the phone books were a list of businesses in your area, private schools being one of them. She opened it to the P, found private schools, and just started calling and gathering information. And she happened to get somebody on the other end of my school that I ultimately went to who was wonderful and sweet and kind. And I remember my mom saying it was the first call she made where she didn’t feel discriminated towards because of her accent. And she said, “I want to take you there. Let’s figure this out.” And so she signed me up for a test. We got in. I remember her saying, my dad was like, “How much is this school?” And she’s like, “It does not matter. She’s smart enough and she needs to go there.” And my mom was the driving force between me going to Fort Worth Country Day and also the driving force between figuring it out. I was on financial aid my entire schooling from third grade was when I started there until I graduated.

Yeah. But I mean, such a leap of faith for her and just a desire of she wanted so much more for you. And I think as a mom, I know you’re a mom, you just have that instinct sometimes where it’s like, we will do whatever it takes to get what we need for our kids.

Absolutely. And I think so much of that, sometimes you’re like, “Well, I don’t know how I’m going to do it. Does that mean I can?” I always told people a plan is an accessory. Your gut and your instincts are what really matter the most in those situations. And my mom just had those instincts. She grew up on the other side of town from where I went to school. And when she was a little girl, she says she would kind of look out and see these really big twinkling lights. And that was downtown Fort Worth. Now, if you are from Fort Worth, you know that back then it was not big twinkling lights, but that’s how my mom remembers it. That’s such a visceral memory for her. And even when I grew up, I was like, “Mom, those lights aren’t that big. It’s not a huge downtown.” And she said, “It was enough.” And she was like, “I want to get to those lights. And if I can’t get to those lights, I want her to be able to live in those lights.”

That’s really special. Okay. So talk to me about the influence that your uncle had on you after college.

Yeah. So I graduated from Country Day and I ended up getting a full academic scholarship to George Washington University where I pursued a business degree because I think like a lot of first generation college attendees in their family, you kind of do the safe thing. And I felt like if I had a business degree, I would always have a job. Same thing. I could be an accountant. I could do anything. And so I kind of had that degree because I wanted to do that for my mom, but that’s not really where my passions lied. And while I was at GW, I wrote for the newspaper, I launched a radio station there. I did every extracurricular you could imagine that had nothing to do with a business degree because I wanted to take advantage of everything that was there. And when I was graduating, I interviewed for investment banking jobs. I interviewed for finance jobs as any good top 10% graduate of their class would. And I just knew that it was time for me to do something for myself. And I got offered a very nice salary with a ton of benefits to work in finance. And I told my mom and she’s like, “Obviously, take it.This is amazing.” And then I remember talking to my uncle who is kind of the creative in the family. He is the baby, and he was a hairdresser in Austin, Texas at the time. And he had amazing clients, and one of them happened to work in publishing in New York. And he said, “Well, what is it that you actually want to do?” And I said, “Well, I don’t know if I even can say it out loud.” And he’s like, “Whisper the thing that you don’t say to anybody.” And I was like, “Okay, I want to work in fashion.” And I said it like that because I wasn’t raised in a way where you could pursue something that felt like a passion. Work was like roll up your sleeves, head down nine to five or nine to nine, whatever it was. It wasn’t about pursuing something that brought you joy and happiness. It was about doing a job. And so I didn’t know that I could even want or desire those things. And he said, “I’m going to make a phone call.” And my uncle’s the reason I ended up working in fashion. He had an amazing connection in publishing and I interviewed and I ended up getting my first job in fashion, which was as an assistant at W Magazine. Man. And I have to say, I turned down, I think it was 2002. I graduated in 2002, so I think I turned down $150,000 in 2002 to take what effectively was a minimum wage job that was about $27,000 a year to be an assistant at a fashion magazine. My poor mother had a heart attack. She could not believe what I had done. But there are these times in your life where you just have to bet on yourself.

Totally.

And that was a huge lesson for me. And I made that bet and look at what I’m doing now.

I know. It is so crazy. Where did you find the courage to be like, “Okay, I’m just going to do this.”

I mean, youth and being really naive. I wish I had some really inspirational moment to tell you, but I do think that’s one of the greatest blessings of being young. And I say that to a lot of my mentees is do it now. You can do it at 50, you can do it at 60, but you definitely can do it at 20 because you are so young. You get so many chances to mess up and fail, and who cares? And so I think for me, part of it was just being young, being naive. But I also had that grit and that drive that my mom and my grandmother instilled in me. And I thought, okay, so say this job doesn’t work out and I’m living in New York and I’ve got this rent that I can barely afford. I will figure it out because I am not afraid to work. It’s so true. I am not scared of working hard. If anything, it comes really natural to me. And I think that kind of confidence was instilled in me from a very young age. I think it’s very much immigrant and first generation mindset. And so here I was living in New York on a $27,000 a year job in an apartment that I could not afford. And I was like, “I’m going to figure it out.” And I did. And just figure it out. I thrived in New York. It’s at the core of who I am. It’s the reason I was able to succeed. And the reason that I think I am so successful in what I do now is because I was a baby in New York and I came of age there.

Yeah. So many of the things you said, I’m just sitting over here being like, “Yes, yes, yes. Say it out louder.” Because it’s so true. Some of those really strong core values of just how you were raised, it’s like you said, that grit, figuring it out and just betting on yourself. Sometimes that’s really what it takes to take a huge leap is making that bet.

Yeah.

And not being afraid.

Exactly. And I heard somebody say earlier this week, they were talking about their kids and how hard it is to parent because you don’t want your kids to have negative feelings or negative experiences in life if they’re being bullied in school. And it’s not our job and you can’t protect your kids from those external sources of discomfort. What you can do is make a really safe space for them to come to you. And I think I always knew in my heart that I would have a really soft landing because if I had to go home, I’d land at home with my mom and my brother and my family. And I think that’s also really important too, that the security and safety that my mom created for us was something that I knew I had in the back of my mind. And now as a mom, I’m always like, oh. If something bad happened at school, I’m like, “I’m so angry.” And then I’m like, “I can’t control that. I can’t control how the world responds to him. And it would be exhausting to try, but what I can do is create the safest space for him to come home to.

Yeah. No, that’s great parenting advice too. Okay. So you ended up landing a spot on the Philly local news.

Yes.

How did that transition happen?

So I was living in New York and I fell in love with my husband. He lived in Philadelphia, which I told him at the time was geographically undesirable. And little did I know that Philadelphia would be one of my favorite places in the entire world. I moved to Philly and I left my job, so I moved to Philly and was unemployed. And I started a blog when I was in Philadelphia, and it was called The Cheap Chica’s Guide to Style. Now, this was in 2008, so this was OG blogging days. Brian Boy, Susie Bubble. If you’ve been in the blogging world, you know they’re icons. And I started a blog and nobody knew what a blog was, and they thought it was a disease that I had. And I was as authentic as I could possibly be. I went to TJ Maxx, I found three really good pieces, and I wrote about them. And it’s so funny to think that I still do that today in a different form, but I still do it. So true. And I started that blog and it got a lot of press right at the beginning. Glamour picked it up and a interviewer at, I think it was ABC read my blog, saw the article and was like, “Hey,” I think her name is Nidia Hahn. She’s like, “I’d love to do a TV segment with you. Is that something you’d be interested in?” And I though, “Yeah, what do you want to do?” And so we did a look for less on how to shop like J-Lo in Center City, Philadelphia. And that segment took off. And before I knew it, I was interviewing at NBC 10 in Philadelphia, which is their competitor, NBC. And I went in to oversee a lifestyle vertical that they were launching at the time. And the woman who was in charge of that, her name is Karen Arazia, she is my TV angel, said, “Do you have background in television?” I said, “Actually, I do. I was a producer in college. I launched a radio station.” She goes, “I can tell.” She goes, “I think I want to introduce you to our news director.” And I said, “Great, let’s go.” So I went in, and over the course of 20 minutes, I think I impressed him very much. I know that I did. And he said, “What you’re doing right now is you’re a consumer reporter. You’re just doing it online. How about doing it for our brand new consumer show that’s launching in a month?” And I said, “Done.” And he’s like, “Do you know how to edit?” I was like, “Yes.” And he was like, “Have you written a script for television?” Yes. All lies. None of that was true. Fake it till you make it. Exactly. None of that was true. And then before the interview ended, I said, “Just so you know, I haven’t done those technically, but I can figure it out.” And he was like, “I have all the confidence in the world. And if anyone can figure this out, it is you, Liliana Vasquez.” And I said, “Great.” And I landed a job in the top five market in the country as a reporter with zero TV news experience. That’s amazing. It was pretty amazing, and it was such a formative time of my life. I mean, I learned how to report in Philadelphia, which is a very hard news market. I had a really tough news director who critiqued my writing and made me a really strong writer and a really strong reporter. I mean, I went to bootcamp, and it was necessary because the next hill that I was going to tackle was going to be the Today Show.

Right. Yeah. You’re like, “We’re only going up from here.” Yes. Yes. Man, that’s amazing. And I’m sure the experience of just another time where you’re betting on yourself and having to figure it out, but for the good of something else.

Yeah. I felt like what I was doing online needed to reach more women. I was watching the magazines around me sell this very aspirational lifestyle, but there was an accessibility piece missing from everything that I was reading. And it was almost kind of like they looked down on you if you were shopping on the clearance rack at TJ Maxx. Meanwhile, that’s how I grew up shopping. It’s the only way that I could access any type of fashion. And it wasn’t fashion in terms of what was in Vogue Magazine, but it was fashion to me. And I thought, why is no one talking about this in a bigger way? Why is no one sharing that they’re prideful about being able to find an amazing value or an amazing bargain because they’re saving to buy a house and they’re saving to send their kid to college. To me, there is so much worth in saving your money for something that’s bigger than just clothes.

Totally.

And that narrative was missing from the fashion conversation. And I really experienced that when I got my first job at W, I was the girl that was going down to Canal Street. Everyone else was shopping on Fifth Avenue and I was like, “Wait, I don’t have that kind of money.” And so I was always that cheap chica at the core. And I was just lucky enough to be able to have a platform where I could have other women see it and feel seen and respected in their decisions to shop cheap and to save their money for things that were better investments.

So true. What did you learn about storytelling during this season of life?

I think for me, what I realized was I needed somebody else to tell me that just being me was the key to success. I, again, was faced with that imposter syndrome because I didn’t come from news. I didn’t have a journalism degree. I had never worked in television news. And so I felt like such an imposter in that newsroom because most of my peers, one of them being Kristen Welker, who went on to become a chief White House correspondent and is now an anchor of NBC Today Show, was literally sitting across from me. So this is the caliber of reporter I was next to. And here I’m like, “Go shopping for your Halloween costumes at Five Below.” And what my news director taught me was authenticity is the only thing you need to make a good story. It’s not about how you tell the story in terms of do you have the credentials to be telling the story? It’s what is your authentic point of view and what are you bringing about yourself to this story? And when you think about news, a lot of news directors don’t push their reporters in that direction because news is depersonalized. You’re supposed to decentralize. And I think what Chris really taught me was that good storytelling has heart and it has authenticity. And even though I couldn’t do that in every story, in the stories when I could, it was really important. And those are some of the stories that I’m most proud of to this day. And it’s still something I think about when I’m shooting reels in this room for Instagram, because that is really at the core of connection with your community.

Totally. Well, and I mean, you’re having conversations that people on the other side of the television are like, “Oh, that’s attainable for me. Oh, I could go and do that and it wouldn’t cost a fortune.” Exactly. So that relatability, it was actually hitting home in a way that sometimes I feel like that’s just not the same way that it happens.

Yeah. And I think so much about being on television, even though you’re a host, somebody said this to me, was you’re still acting, you’re still pretending to be something because you’re not interested in everything. You’re still kind of faking enthusiasm for celebrities or press junkets that you’re not that interested in. So while you can still show up authentically, there is a piece of you that is pretending. And I think for me, that was a lot of the unlearning I did as I transitioned out of my role as a correspondent.

Yeah. Okay. So then how did that role take you to the Today Show, Access Hollywood, E? Oh my gosh. So amazing.

I’ve been really lucky to have incredible people on my team and behind the scenes. And when I was working in Philly, I auditioned for a show in New York. It was a daily lifestyle show on local TV in New York. I lived in Philadelphia at the time. My husband was about to go to business school and I got the job. The problem was I couldn’t move to New York. We couldn’t afford it, and my husband was going to business school. And so I immediately said, “I’m going to take this job. I’m going to commute to New York City from Philadelphia.” Wow. And so I would get on a 505 train out of 30th Street Station in Philadelphia, commute to New York, do a full day at my job in New York, and then take the train home. And once I had been there long enough, I got them to stipend a hotel overnight on Monday nights so that I could do back-to-back days and then stipend to Hotel Thursday nights so I could do back-to-back days and I took Wednesdays off. When you want something really bad, you figure it out. Was it ideal? No. Did I have a social life? No. But I was working the number one market in the country within two years of starting in Philadelphia. It was unprecedented that somebody could literally be working in that market. And when I was on that show, I met a woman named Amy Rosenblum, and I call her my rabbi. She was really one of the most difficult bosses I’ve ever had in my entire life, and I’ve said this to her face. And she also, I think, taught me the best lesson that I have ever learned in my career because I got so mad at her one day. I marched into her office and yelled at her because she had put a younger reporter on air to anchor that show over me. And I was so upset with her, and I was angry, and she just let me talk. She just let me talk. And then I said, “I don’t understand why you’re not responding, why you’re not reacting.” She’s like, “Well, Liana, this has nothing to do with me.” And I said, “Excuse me?” I was so fired up. And she said, “Have you ever asked me to anchor the show?” And I stopped because I thought, “Oh my God, I have actually never asked my boss for the thing that I want more than anything. I have thought about it and I’d had inner monologues about it, but I had never actually asked her for that job.” And she said, “This other person has asked me at least a dozen times.” So of course, when the opportunity came up, I gave it to her. And I said, “Wow, I am so sorry.” And she said, “Don’t be sorry because you’re about to learn the best lesson of your career. No one is ever going to give you something that you do not ask for.” So true. And I have used that little gem so many times in my career. It’s how I got on the Today Show. I asked, it’s how I ended up hosting and anchoring The Today Show when I filled in when our co-hosts were out. The only reason you get something that you want professionally is because you are ballsy enough to ask the question that you’re scared to ask.

That’s so true. That’s such great advice. And what’s the worst that could happen? They say no.

Yeah. And then you just ask, “By the way, just ask again. Don’t be afraid of the ask.” Especially I think for me, again, because part of me thought, “I don’t even deserve to be here. How could I ask for more when I’m barely supposed to be in this building?” But yeah, she’s been an incredible. I mean, she’s the one that got me on the Today Show. She marched me over there and said, “This is someone that needs to be on the show as a style expert, as a fashion expert, as somebody that you use as a correspondent for stories.” And yeah, she believed in me probably more than I ever believed in myself at that phase of my life. And again, it’s having these people in your corner that are willing to fight for you and fight for you when you’re not in the room.

Right. And that’s really great to have people behind you who will do that.

For sure.

Okay. So there was a pivotal moment at eNews where you had to walk away from a brand opportunity.

Yes.

Can you share what happened and what it taught you?

Absolutely. I was at my dream job. eNews was the dream. I remember watching Juliana DePandi at the time, Juliana DePandi, when I was in college watching her be so charismatic and so fun and so smart and so witty. And I was like, “I want that job.” Again, whispering it, “I want the job.” And thinking, “It’s just not possible. I could never have this.” And I got that job in 2019. And it was right before the pandemic. And I only say that because ultimately it ended my dream job, but that’s okay. And while I was there, as a host, you’re put up for brand deals all the time in the same way that influencers are put up for brand deals all the time. The difference is as an influencer, a brand is paying you directly and you get that full fee. When you work for a network, they own you. You are their intellectual property and your name and your likeness and your brand belongs to them. And while I was under contract at E, that was very much true. And there was a huge integration, which is what we call it in television. It’s the same thing as a branded or sponsored content deal in the influencer world. And I was not covering the Oscars for whatever reason. And so I had nothing to do with any broadcast talking about the Oscars. And an incredible brand came to my manager and said, “We’d love Liliana to front this really cool piece of content. We’re going to be on the red carpet. We’re building out this microsite, and this is the number.” Now, the number was about $250,000. And that was about more than half than I made as a salary at eNews. And I remember thinking, “This is life-changing money. I want to buy a house. This is life-changing.” And my manager said, “Okay, let’s get excited after we talk to legal.” And we went to legal and presented them with the offer and said, “Listen, she’s not touching any property that has E on it. She’s not going to say E. They’re not even mentioning that she’s the host of eNews, and you’re not using her.” And I was really sad that I wasn’t being used. If I’m being a hundred percent honest with you, I was actually devastated that they didn’t pick me for this. And it was really upsetting and it made me feel really small. And so when this opportunity came in, it was kind of like a gift. I was like, “Oh my God, I am worthy of being on the carpet.” And they ultimately said, “No, she can’t do it. She can’t do it because she works for us. And that’s a sales opportunity that our team could go and do. And no, she can’t do it. And we’d love to let her do it, but if she does it, that sets precedent for other hosts. And that’s just not something that we’re able to accommodate under the current contract.” And that was it. At that moment, I knew that the world of integrated branded content was changing forever and that brands were going direct to people that had a community and had an audience. And that is where the creator economy was going to be built. It was going to be built directly with creators like you, like me, like the people that are listening now. And I am so happy that that happened because that really planted the seed for me to say, “I might have a year, year and a half left in this contract. It’s over. Unless they offer me the world and they open up my contract to say that I can do branded outside of E, there’s no opportunity for me here. There is no runway here.” And I have to say, e-news just got canceled last week for the third time. The show is off the air as it is known to you and I, and as it’s known the way we saw it. And I did a TikTok that went viral about this because I said the writing was on the wall when I was there because of this exact story. Because they didn’t let their host take outside deals. And so that’s when I knew how big the creator economy was and what the potential was for the influencer space. And I was like, “Let me figure it out. Let me figure out how I do this because I had community. I had a community that I had already built. So how do I speak to them more? How do I make it bigger?” And that’s the moment where I thought, “You know what? This is where I want to be now. And how do I work to do that?”

Right. Another leap of faith opportunity that really was probably one of the best moves, especially for your career now.

Yeah. And I don’t say that to say that I didn’t literally doubt myself for two years straight after I left E. I didn’t know what I was going to do. Honestly, it took me two years to figure it out. I have an amazing coach and therapist that I talk to, but for me it was what is my value and what is my worth if I’m not attached to that brand? If I’m not attached to NBC, which I had been at for over a decade, if I’m not attached to E or the today show, what is my social currency? Do people even want to have me at events? Do they care about me? And it was really hard to deal with that. I think when you lose a job or you move on from a job, there’s so much identity loss that happens in that moment. But something that kind of guided me through that was this thing that Oprah had said years and years ago, which was nothing matters unless you own the content. And if you don’t own your content, you really don’t own anything at all. And I think about Oprah now and I’m like, she was kind of the OG influencer. Her and Martha Stewart were kind of doing this in their own way, obviously on linear TV, but Oprah owned the entire vertical. She was the production company, so nobody could bypass her if they wanted her. And I think what she built is so smart and it’s what you see creators building today to incredible success. And guess who owns your content? You own your content. That’s the value.

Having this background and kind of leaving E the way that you did, how do you feel about running your brand now and what is that like?

It’s so much harder than any day I have ever had on set at the Today Show at Access or at E. I had somebody ask me a couple of weeks ago, they’re currently on air and they want to transition into doing more in the social space. And when I broke down for them what it takes to do what we do, they said, thanks, but no thanks. Yeah. Nevermind. Nevermind. Because when you work on air, you get hair and makeup done every morning. You have multiple producers, you have a team of producers, you have an assistant, you have researchers, you have directors, you have lighting directors, you have camera operators, you have editors, you have graphics, and you also have publicists and marketers that are all helping you push forward whatever you’re doing. We do all of that.

All of that.

We are the team. We are the team. And I have support now. I didn’t have support when I started. I couldn’t survive without the support that I have now and the infrastructure for my team. But most creators are doing everything that I was doing as a host by themselves. And the level of respect I have for creators now that I am in this business and kind of launching my career as a creator, it’s unbelievable. I watched it from the outside for so long and I was like, can’t be that hard. Oh my God. I was an idiot. An idiot. I have swallowed my ego and been like, oh no, no. My hardest day on set does not compare to what creators do day in and day out.

It’s so true.

It is the hardest thing in the world. And I think people don’t get it because they’re not doing it and because you get to watch a 60-second clip of what that is. And you’re not seeing the hours of hard work and the angle change and the cameras and the editor. I mean, it’s an incredible amount. The respect that I have for creators is just next level.

Yeah. I mean, I think that’s what makes it so fascinating and something I applaud those of us who have stayed in the industry for as long as we have, because it is such hard work. It is a great – And you have to be willing to do all of that hard work. That’s right. I mean, back to your origin story and with the grit and things like that, you can’t do this without some of those just building blocks and stepping stones that keep it going because it’s like you got to bet on yourself every day.

You absolutely do. And I always think of posting a reel or a TikTok. It’s almost like a little bit of science, a little bit of data, but a lot of it’s kind of like pulling the handle on a slot machine.

Yeah. It’s so true. You just don’t know. Especially with the algorithm and things. I’ll tell my team, I’m like, “I am so excited for this reel. I worked so hard. This was such a great idea. I sourced some pieces that I though were so awesome. People are going to love it. I cannot wait to get it out there.” It gets out there and I’m like, “Why aren’t more people loving this? This was going to be like, this is it.” And it’s just like, I still love the content as much as I did before I posted it, but there’s all these other pieces of doubt that fall in when it’s like, it didn’t take off like I though it would. Or was it you start asking, was this the wrong time of day to post? All these doubts that come in and it’s like you could still love the content and it might not perform well, but there’s always tomorrow. There’s always the next reel.

Wait, can I ask you a question as somebody who’s newer to this business? Yeah. When that happens, how do you kind of work your way back to the confident woman that I see come across on all of your reels? Because I think given your community and the size of your brand and your business and everything that you’re doing, it’s amazing to me. And it’s so relatable. And I thank you so much for sharing that, that you actually still are running through the same questions I ask myself as someone who’s a year and a half, two years into this. How do you get back to, “But I’m really good at this and my community wants this.” How do you get back there?

So it’s so funny because one of the girls on my team, I feel like every six weeks I hit this block again and she’s always like, “Okay, remember we talked about this six weeks ago?” But I mean, I will really have to kind of stop what I’m doing and just be like, “Why am I doing this number one?” Take my mind back to the basics is what I always call this process. And I go back and I’m like, “Okay, stop everything. If I were to not be making any money doing this, would I still be happy to share those outfits that I selected for that reel? If the answer’s yes, okay, great. Then you are super passionate about that and it was not something you could control.” And there’s a lot of things about this job that we cannot control. We can control the content. We can take the feedback that people say, “Hey, we want to see more of this type of outfit.” Okay, great. I can work on sourcing and producing that for you. But I have to take it back to if this was not my job, would I still be passionate about it? And with that being said, it is my job, it is my career, it’s several other people’s career. And it’s just a piece of content. And it just for some reason today didn’t work well, but I’m proud of it. I really enjoyed it. I know somebody out there liked it. I mean, it got some views, it made money. Those are all really positive things that I want to happen to every piece of content, but not every piece of content is made to go viral. And that’s okay. And then a lot of times, two weeks later, that piece of content will start getting more views. And I’m like, “Man, I wish I could have told myself, hey, you’re two weeks ahead, you’re going to not even care about that piece of content. You’re going to be onto the next.”

It’s so true. Yeah. And it’s so funny that you say that because I always think about this. And when I talk to younger creators and they’re like, “How’d you do it? What’d you do?” And I say, and to your point, not every piece of content is a growth value. Every content has a different type of purpose in your programming. Totally. And I come from TV, so I come from programming, and I understand how our programming team works and our programming execs and what each piece does. There’s a reason that Netflix puts a reality show next to a docu-series next to a big glossy show. And that’s because each of those properties is attracting a different type of metric or goal for them. For sure. And I think same thing with creators. Sometimes I just do it because I want to do it. Sometimes I posted a funny, I though it was cute video of my son trying to rock climb. It did terrible. I laughed so hard. I still laugh so hard at that video, and it brings me so much joy. So that’s like a me, that’s all me. Then there’s pieces of content that I see as like, okay, this is to go out and attract eyes. This is something that’s going to attract new followers. Then there’s pieces that are going to convert, whether it’s for a brand or for your own affiliates. You’re going to convert on this piece because you’re sharing the best white T-shirts, and that’s something everybody wants to watch. And then there’s also content that you just do for your core community where you’re like, “You guys, this one’s just for you.” And so your evaluation of the success of each of those pieces has to hit that lens. What lens did I have on this? What is the goal of this piece of content? Because the goal can’t all be, I just want more followers.

Right. Right? Well, and sometimes I feel like the pieces of content that are really just for me or that I’m like, “Oh, I love this so much. I want to tell…” Sometimes that’s not what does the best. But I can’t let that stop me from sharing those random little pieces of me because that’s telling a bigger story that maybe somebody who follows me for one reel and then they’re scrolling my profile, they’re like, “Oh, I didn’t realize that about her. That’s a connection that we share that I didn’t know,” but that’s part of the story that they’re going to eventually hear. But it is very hard when you’re in the moment to have all of those thoughts of like, okay, it’s going to be okay. You just want it all to do well. And that’s definitely something I feel like no matter what size you are on your followers or where you are in your growth, that’s something that people struggle with at all levels.

I love hearing that. It’s so reassuring to hear you say that because I definitely go through that too where I’m like, “What is going on?” But you’re right, I think it’s really having that aerial view that this is part of a bigger story. This a piece of a puzzle. This isn’t just one take with me because you’re not going to know someone after one video. Totally. And then also just understanding that every piece of content you put out there is a type of programming and they don’t all have to be the same.

Totally. Yeah. So with the content that you’re producing on your page now, what would you say is your favorite type of content to make?

Probably the ones that people hate the most and the ones that they like when I post them, they’re like, “Oh, I can breathe now. I made it through this, not this without being on the not this.” So this not this is my favorite thing to do. And the reason it’s my favorite thing to do is because This Not This started in a dressing room at the Today Show. When I was a style expert and I would dress models for the segment, I’d come out and be like, “Okay, what are the best wide leg jeans to wear?” And my assistant would hold up two pairs of jeans and I’d be like, “This, not this.” And then she’d hold up two shirts and I’d be like, “This, not this.” And I remember one day I said to one of my producers, “Why don’t we do this on the show?” And they were like, “I’m sorry, you want me to put an H&M pair of jeans and have you say to five million people, not this?” And I said, “Yeah, because the value is in not just understanding what the this is, but understanding why not this.” And they said, “Yeah, that’s not going to happen.” And I said, “Okay, no worries.” And I remember when I was really kind of programming my account after I decided to really commit and double down on this, I thought, wait a minute, remember that segment they said no to? That is at the core of who I am because I can walk into any store with any friend, any age, any budget, any size, and literally do this, not this, and we can walk a store and be checked out in under 10 minutes. It is one of my greatest sources of pride. So that’s my favorite to make. But I know that it definitely puts people on pins and needles because they’re like, “Do I have the not this?” And I always say, “Listen, if you have it, who cares? I have not thises in my. If I open my closet, I have tons of them.” Style is an evolution. You go through different phases. It’s just in the moment that’s what I’m talking about. But those are my favorite. They’re fun, they’re easy to make. And I think it brings me a lot of joy because I think they help a lot of people. And people don’t have an hour to watch my YouTube video. Not that I have a YouTube, but if I had one. And this is a great way to take three things away from what I’m teaching you. And that’s one thing I have learned in TV is how to be succinct. I would have 120 seconds live on air on the Today Show to show six different pairs of jeans.

Yeah. And so you’ve kind of dialed that down in real form. But it’s also, I think what’s so fascinating about that series is it’s helping people make a quick decision. That is such a help. So many times people are like, you have no idea how the fact that you said, here are your two options and here’s two ways to wear them. I can just take that idea, go to my closet, pick it out and not have to think about out of all these clothes, what am I going to select? I’ve been told, here’s what you should wear today.

Absolutely. I think one of the hardest things for women, especially for moms is the execution of style. We get so lost and you can know what you like and you can know what to shop for, but actually executing it in an OOTD or a daily outfit is so hard. We have, sometimes I call it paralysis by analysis where we second guess ourselves. And so you’re so right. Just being able to be like, wait, but I watched that reel and I have these two red shirts, but she said not the keyhole neck. Okay, I’m going to go with this one. That to me, I want to be a resource for women that are just standing there going, I know my style and I know what I want to wear, but I don’t know how to execute that style. And I’m like, lean on me. Let me talk to you.

Totally. Well, and I think back to those hard days of where it’s like, oh, this isn’t working, or nobody liked what I was doing, or you just fill in the dumps for a week because the algorithm, those moments –

The algorithm hates you. Right.

Those moments, knowing that a simple video that you did helped somebody make that decision to feel confident. Then I’m like, okay, but that’s all worth it. This is hard for me right now, but I’m going to blow past this. I’m helping women feel confident getting dressed, helping them make decisions on style. And I think so many times I even find myself just forgetting how important that is in this industry and that we really are helping people get dressed every day. So running a business, being a mom, being a wife, do you have any tips on just how you do it all? I feel like people that I interview, that’s always one thing I bring it back to is just we’re real people with real problems, with kids that have camps and back-to-school deadlines and a reading list that we have yet to accomplish for summer.

I am so afraid of that. My son is four. We’re not there yet, but my friends have older kids and the reading list is like reckoning.

Yes.

It’s crazy.

It is crunch time right now.

Yeah, I know. This is hard. This is the hardest. We’re about to get to really hard.

Yeah.

I don’t have, again, some magical mantra. I will say that something that I’ve learned in the last year or so is that I have to really ground myself before I can do anything. And so for me, that happens to be either really quality one-on-one time with my girlfriends, my very close girlfriends, who I can just be the worst version of myself with no judgments. And that can be a walk. I live in LA, so we hike a lot. It could be a walk on the beach, it can be a hike. It could also be a margarita literally outside on my deck in our pajamas. It does not have to be fancy. Sometimes that’s the best. But more often than not, for me, it’s Pilates. I really fell in love with Pilates while I was pregnant. And I think it’s because it was all about me. And that practice teaches me that it is okay to think about myself first. So true. And as a mom, you think about everybody else first. And not even as a mom, because even when I didn’t have my son, I always thought about everybody else first. I thought about my husband first, my brother, my mom, my best friends. It’s something that we’re taught we should be doing. And you should. It is a beautiful thing to care about other people, but I think not at the expense of caring about yourself. Totally. And there is something about Pilates that is so purely focused on you, and you have to be so present in your body and in your mind to execute some of the harder things. That one hour that I give to myself in the mornings is really the way that I ground myself to show up present in every other area of my life. Whether that’s time with my son or time as a family, being in a meeting, leading a panel, being on this podcast with you. So I have to do that prep work in order to even attempt to manage success in the totality of what is my life.

And don’t you find that when maybe something has come up and you haven’t been able to give yourself that time, it is not good for you.

I’m a disaster.

It’s like the axis on the wheel is off and you have to get it back in place to be the best version of yourself, to support your family. I notice that a lot too, and it’s so important. I think I’m a better mom. I’m a better wife when I have taken care of myself.

Yeah. And it’s so funny, my husband and I go to couples therapy because we want to stay married. And we’ve been married 17 years. And we’re like, “No, no, no. We got a good streak here. We’re not messing this up.” And I kept getting really frustrated in the mornings when I would come home from a Pilates class or if it was a morning that I wasn’t doing that, but I was getting ready. And he’s like, “You’re so angry sometimes in the morning.” And I was like, “Yeah, it’s because I’m constantly getting interrupted when I’m trying to just put on mascara and I just need 17 minutes. I just need 17 minutes.” And he’s like, “Oh, you don’t want me to talk to you while you’re getting ready?” And I was like, “No, I don’t.” And my therapist said, “Have you ever voiced this?” I said, “No. Why have I never said. You know what? For me, for him, it could be whatever, a long hot shower where he’s unbothered. For me, I’m in and out of the shower in three minutes, unless I’m doing my everything shower, which that’s a whole different thing. But in the morning, from the time I peel off my skin mask and my skin tape to the time where I finish my hair, it’s usually less than 20 minutes. I don’t want to be spoken to or interrupted for those 20 minutes. And if I can get those, I am so happy. I’m bouncing up the stairs. I’m like, What can I do for you today? And it’s so simple, but it was so hard to connect the anger and the frustration and the resentment with me not being able to vocalize something that who doesn’t need. My husband gets up and does his coffee and his scrolling on his Kindle in peace every morning. And guess what? He bounces down the stairs and he’s really happy. And here I am, a crazy tornado mess being like, wait a minute, all I need to do is my makeup in peace and his whole family is so much better. And so it’s just these little things, and I don’t know why I didn’t say that. And now sometimes I’m like, why aren’t you talking to me?

Right. You’re like, I’m okay today. Please come.

My poor husband, not my poor husband, he’s fine. But you know what I’m saying? But he really was responsive to it and it has made our mornings so much better because again, it’s another way to just be able to ground in myself before I try to be grounded for anybody else.

Totally. That’s so important to figure out what it is that you need and then give that to yourself. If you’re going to figure out what your kids need do and you’re going to give it to them, what your husband needs, you’re going to give it to them. So why are we skipping us? Let’s fill our cups first.

Yeah. We’re the stingiest of all with ourselves. Every woman I talk to who is working and staying home, or even my friends that are stay-at-home moms, they’re the stingiest of all with themselves. Because all day long they give and they give and they give and they give. And I’m like, no, no, no, pour back in. Pour back in.

So, so important.

Yeah.

Okay. So I have a few questions left and then we’re going to wrap up. But one of them is what are five pieces that you are really excited about for fall?

Ooh, okay. I love this question. Okay, so I am really excited about a cropped trench. I live in LA and we don’t get a lot of opportunity to wear outerwear. So I feel like leather jacket trench is where I usually go because I can layer it over anything and I still feel seasonally appropriate. So I’m really excited about that. I am really excited about the staying power of chocolate brown. It’s one of my favorite colors. I think it’s also hugely complimentary to so many different eye colors and hair colors with the right shade. And I love mixing it with navy and black, which are two colors that are in my wardrobe. So I love the staying power that it has. I am excited for a straighter slimmer jean, not a skinny jean.

No, not a skinny jean.

But I am excited for that because I do love the silhouette that it creates. Agree. And I think it gives you a lot more versatility, and I’m all about value and versatility in our closets. Listen, I have probably 35 pairs of jeans, and so I have a lot of wide leg and baggy and loose, but I don’t find them to have the same level of versatility.

Totally. And the shoe options. Oh my gosh. You can create so many outfits with a more structured, I feel like straighter leg.

Yes, totally. That feels like denim. That’s the other thing I will say. It has to feel like denim.

True.

So this is not a fashion thing, but it’s a beauty thing. So I love this return to really elegant, simple nails. I have been on a natural nail journey because if I showed you the pictures of my nails, you would be horrified. And so three months ago, I was like, “I’m going to really commit to this in the same way that I commit to my skincare routine and my haircare routine.” And I now take so much pride in my nails. And I love that we’re seeing all these really beautiful, elegant return to just very simple nails. I think that’s such a great palette for really chunky people jewelry, which I’m also really excited about. And then in terms of shoes, I love all boots. I am a bootaholic.

Yes.

I collect boots, and I feel like there’s been so much to shop for. So I love a great ankle boot. I love an over-the-knee boot. I love a knee-high boot, even though I’m really short, sometimes they hit me at the wrong place. So I would say those are probably the five things that I’m most looking forward to for fall. And just layering in general. I think you have so much more opportunity to show off your style and personality with layers. I try to layer sometimes when it’s 85 degrees outside and I’m not layering.

Right. Okay. So how do you deal with wanting to wear these beautiful fall outfits, but in LA where it’s so hot? Are you like, okay, we’re going on trips, we’re going places. How do you overcome that?

Well, I think part of it is definitely that I get to go to New York for work probably once a month. So I pack a big 50 pound suitcase with all my stuff and I get it out of my system. And then some days, you know what? I just make a really bold choice of fashion over function and I don’t care. Sometimes I am going to wear the layers and I have air conditioning in my car if I get hot.

Exactly.

And that’s –

Well, and if you’re inside somewhere, it’s air conditioned.

You’re fine. Yeah. I mean, it’s so funny, I did a reel on Sunday because I was tied a sweater around my waist because I liked my outfit, but it felt incomplete because it was missing what I call that third layer. And I had this really pretty butter yellow sweater, and I wore it a lot when I was on the East Coast in the summer because it was kind of cool when I got there. And I was like, “It’s only 80 today. I can wear this.” So I tied it around my waist and I did a reel saying, listen, sometimes you just really have to choose fashion over function because it helps you complete an outfit. Totally. And if you don’t feel like you’re dressing like a Pinterest girly or your favorite style inspo, sometimes it’s because you’re choosing function over fashion. And that is okay. Most days I pick function over fashion. I have a toddler who is intense and we’re running around from camp to camp in the summer and we’re in the pool, we’re out of the pool, we’re at the beach, we’re at play dates, and heels don’t make sense. But sometimes last week I wore a pair of Adidas athletic shorts with kitten heels. And I was like, “This makes no sense, but it looks so cute.”

But I’m doing it.

But I am doing it for myself.

Yeah. And that goes back to the point. You have to do those things there for yourself. And some people will be like, “What is that girl doing? This for me. This outfit is for me. It is not for you. If I want to wear tool to target, I will.”

Oh my God, tool to target should be a blog or a substack.

I know. Truly.

What a cheese.

Somebody needs to scoop that up.

No kidding. I love the creators that get so what they call overdressed to go get coffee. And they’re like, “If your idea of fun is getting overdressed on a Sunday to go to the farmer’s market and drink coffee, you are my girl.”

Yes.

And I’m like, “I’m your girl.” Yes. We can be friends. We can be friends.

It’s so true. Okay, I’ve got one last question for you. I end all my podcasts with this question. What is the most meaningful act of kindness that somebody has extended to you that has had a lasting impact on your life?

Something happened recently over Christmas that it came from. I have so many beautiful people in my life and I’m so lucky for my family. I’m just blessed. But this came from somebody that was more of an acquaintance. And I think the ability for somebody to share something like that with me in honesty with no motive was I think what made it feel so kind. And it comes back to a work thing. So I know somebody that, I’ve known her probably for 15 years, but we’re more acquaintances than anything. And she sits on a brand team that is responsible for a very large spend in the influencer space. And we have kind of grown up together. We’re both Latina, she’s Dominican, I’m Mexican. And something came across her desk and it was a check that she was signing to me. And we had not spoken in, I don’t know, probably seven years on the phone. We’re friends on Instagram and we’re social friends, but we’re not friends like that. And she DMed me and said, “Can I call you?” And I said, “Yeah, of course.” And she said, “I’m going to have a really honest conversation with you as if you are my best friend or my sister or somebody I care deeply about.” And she said, “You are undervaluing yourself so much.” And she goes, “And I don’t just mean it because of the dollar amount on this check. I mean it in the way that you’re going out into this space. I mean it in terms of the team that you have. And I want to help you see the value in who you are and what you are doing because it’s important and it needs to be seen.” And I said, “Wow.

Yeah.

Why?” And she said, “Number one, I think you’re a really good person and I like to see good people succeed in this business because I’ve seen too many bad people succeed.” She said, “And number two, she goes, I want to do it for our community. I am fiercely proud of being Latina and she is too. And I think when you have power and influence in this space like she does, she wants to create inroads for people like me, who are fiercely proud of who they are and where they come from because if I can do it, that means somebody else can do it.”

Totally.

And she’s like, “That’s why I’m doing it.” And And she has literally helped me re-strategize and rebuild my entire business from the ground up since December.

Wow. That’s such a gift.

Beyond.

Yeah.

And I don’t know anyone that would do that for anybody else. And again, there’s no gain for her. Zero. She just is one of those people that has the kindest, warmest heart and wants to help good people. And she has been instrumental in what I have done in the last year.

Wow, that’s really beautiful.

It floored me because again, I have people in my life that do kind things all the time, but to have somebody that is not family and not a bestie be able to lift you like that.

Totally.

I mean-

And go out of her way to be like, “Hey, I want to help you with this.”

Yes, I want to help you. I want to help you do this.” Opened the doors, made the calls, pushed me, strategized with me, sat with me. I don’t know how I’m ever going to repay her.

Yeah. Wow. That’s truly such a gift. Wow. Well, I have absolutely enjoyed this conversation. Thank you so much for joining me today. Do you mind telling our listeners where they can find you on social media?

Of course, you can find me on Instagram. I am just @lilianavasquez. And then on TikTok, I am @thelianavasquez. Someone stole it from me. My account got hacked, so I lost it. So it’s the Liliana Vasquez on TikTok and just Liliana Vasquez. And then I have a Substack and it’s called Off Camera. And it’s a little bit of fashion, but it’s a lot of things that I have to say off camera.

I love it. It’s funny because I feel like I started this podcast several years ago so that I could say those things off camera, but here we are on camera. But I was like, “No, I need a place where I could talk more about these things.” So anyway, we will also leave all of those links and details in the show notes so you guys listening can just easily click over and give Liliana a follow on Instagram. But thank you so much for your time today. This has been just such a joy of a conversation and just so excited that you were with us today.

Oh, thank you. This time flew by anytime. Thank you so much for having me. I really appreciate it.

Of course. All right, friends, until next time. Hi friend. If you’re loving the show, will you go find that follow button on your podcast app? This will ensure that you won’t miss a single episode. I love having you in this community. Until next time. This season of Life with Loverly is produced by Elizabeth Evans Media Productions.